It’s been half a semester already, but it feels like school just started. We’ve had so much projects, that when I finally stepped into a mall some time ago (for fun, not to buy props etc.), I felt like I haven’t had much of a social life for quite some time. Haven’t even met some of my Sec Sch friends for a period of time. I’m finally going to meet them tomorrow, Finally! And i really miss them alot.. But so much have been happening these times, that it did not really seem like Time anymore. It seemed more like the passing of things. No longer counted in seconds, minutes or hours (unless we are doing the camera reports for the shoots.. hehe), but counted in the things accomplished. It’s kind of weird, but at them same time mysterious.
Many of us (I’m sometimes guilty of this too) complain, complain, complain. We bitch about how the work load seems impossible, and we’ll all die a miserable death. And the best phrase that has been going around is: we have no life anymore. I may not be so much of a complain-er, but I do find myself resenting the burden at times. But the more I think about it, I came to believe that it is not that we no longer have a life, but we have committed and given our lives to something we are passionate about. Not so much that we are going to DIE for making a film, but it’s the time, energy, money, and faith we have put into learning how to make ‘movies’. It is giving so much of ourselves learning and practicing the skill that we might have to give up on certain leisure in life. Like bathing lesser of 15 mins or so. Or eating a spoonful less fof rice so we have more time to complete the projects. Kidding. But you get my point. So, its not that we dont have a life, it’s just that we have committed our life to something we believe in.
In fact, that might just as well be what life is all about. I dont know for sure. As you can see, I’m still in the midst of looking for an answer.
So much have been happening these days. For the past few months, or so to speak. I’ve learnt alot, and I’ve probably seen myself grow. I realise I can overcome things I never thought I’d manage. Which I am thankful for 😉 Thanks to friends who have listened to me speak my heart’s voices in the mid of the day. Thanks to friends who have sent me messages of encouragement. I owe you guys one.
Well, I guess that if life chose to give you sh**, you’ve got to accept it, and learn how to make a better of it. Dont dwell on things and mull over the sad times. Move on. Seek what you love in life. Then embrace it and enjoy it. Thankfully, I’ve got my interest to keep me going. They give me hope, really. Hope that the future is for me to explore. Past is past. Remember the past, treasure it, but dont, please dont, dwell on it. Sometimes, I find myself thinking of the past so much that I forget that I have a future to live.
There were 2 men climbing a mountain. It’s tall, cold, steep and full of obstacles, but the view at the top is spectucular. One man, while climbing, kept looking back. He wanted to see how much he’s conquered and how much he’s climbed. But as he looked back and climbed at the same time, he missed a step and fell. Back to the foot of the mountain he went. The man was in pain, and he has to give up on his chance to reach the mountain top. The second man, like the first, climbed the mountain. However, he did not turn back, but looked to the tip of the mountain and continue on his journey. He met with setbacks and obstacles, but he overcome them. Sometimes he fall a little, but he picked himself up and continued to climb the mountain. Never once did he turn back and look at his trail. Eventually, with much hard work, he reached the top. He saw the beautiful view of the world before him. He succeeded.
Sometimes, this is life. We have a journey ahead of us. We have troubles ahead for us to fix. But we have to learn to face them bravely, and not keep looking back at the past and mull over things of the ‘yesterdays’. We’ve got to learn from the past, but not live in the past.
Sometimes, I cant let go of what happened yesterday, a month ago, or even a year ago. I let the feelings hibernate inside me. I never learnt to let them go. But I guess Im learning how to now. Moving forward, and leaving the pass as it is. Learning from them, but letting them go at the same time.
I just hope that I’m brave enough for the future.
Alright, going to watch Bruce Lee’s Fist of Fury now.. Enough of these thinking 🙂
P.S. You, is relative.