Some people get all they ask for, some don’t even have the rights to beg.

Damn. Why do some people have all they can ever ask for in the world, AND gets the best of both worlds, while some don’t even have the rights to beg?

 

And you can’t get angry, because you don’t even have the rights to do so. (Let’s change the ‘you’ to ‘I’ here…) I mean, I probably don’t have the rights to ask for anything I want for in the world.

 

In chinese, they have a saying: tong ren bu tong ming. It means we’re all humans but each have different fate. And sometimes, when I think how life sucks, I feel embrassed to feel so. There are so much unfortunate people in the world, I should be glad for all I have. Maybe people gets too selfish at times, all they (I) think is myself. Yeah, that perhaps is the case. I should change.

 

Its a miracle even to be living…

 

Adee says she’ll go with me to a mountain (Bukit timah hill) to scream all the troubles away. Can’t wait. Haha!

 

Oh, my Oscar fish, just died 😥 He grew really huge, but suddenly sopped eating. My mom got him new food, he still refuses to eat alot 😦 Sighs.

 

Still can’t find Sweetie. I was at the carpark just now, hoping to see her, somehow. But she did not appear 😥

 

My hamster is sleeping in a little bottle I gave him. I’m so glad to see him using it, don’t know why. Just really happy.. Love him so!

 

Anws, so much happened today. I don’t know why I did what I did. It felt so weird 😦 In front of everyone. Damn. I should have been braver. Sighs…

 

But it made me appreciate my friends so much more, I guess. Adee, who, for some reason, just knew how I felt- so profoundly. Van, who got me a little Johnny Depp moulded sweet dispenser (thanks Van!!!). Adrian, who looked so damn weird and worried for me. Ying, who FB-ed me. Fat, who said little things to me that made me so touched. Those at the audition room who did not probe further about what happened. Duck, who constantly msg me. Huiwen, Cherian, Renee, Siqi, Fatimah (haha!), Jan, Coconut, for the years long friendship and forgiving me when I cant always meet them because of school work (I’m so sorry). Shupig, Qing, Gil… …

 

Friends. They are probably angels sent from heaven. Maybe life don’t suck. These people make my day. I want to keep to my promise of being as good a friend as they are to me…

 

Oh yeah! I had an epiphany. I’ve been struggling so much on the visual look of our short film’s fantasy sequence, and I can’t find a style for it. The digital intermediate of the test footage did not satisfy me. The reds were far too intimaditing, overly bloody and dull. We wanted something less forbolding. It looks cool on its own, but it might just bring across a too serious tone to the film.

So I did research on old Japanese paintings, drawings. We sort of prefered using that as a style for the fantasy sequence of the film and have the hero (main character in the fantasy) stand out in a somewhat Sin City look. Thats an idea, though.

I’m not a huge fan of CG, special effects, etc. I still prefer traditional things you could do in-camera or with simple post effects. Or things done on set. Things so simple but beautiful, and something that NEVER (most importantly) take audiences out of the story. Oh well, thats my view. Somehow it feels like no one (not much) feels the same way… And its always tempting to do something cool and drift away from story-wise. But its an important mistake I can’t afford to make..

 

Anyone with any comments please feel free to share them with me. Love to hear such stuff 🙂

 

P.S. You is relative. Don’t screw it up..

 

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