If I had known humans had the weakness to get hurt, I shouldnt even have started on what would have eventually caused me so much pain. And I’ve realised that the person you trust most and love most are usually the people that turn your life around.
People always say, when asked if they would want to turn back time, that they don’t. It I had that choice, I would. I did something some 1 year ago out of ‘moral’ obligations and out of fear. Now, I’m regretting every moment of it. I hate it so much. I want to be somewhere else now. But its far too late. And I cant turn back time, can’t I? And after all I’ve sacrificed, they dont give a damn. All the pain I’ve been through, they don’t know. They don’t want to know. How I’ve spent my birthday this year crying because of THAT. They never bothered. But they took it for granted. They think its just right for me to do so. And now they are happy that their little damn group is a happy little thing on its own. All but 2 people feel the same. And I still can’t believe that they talk bad about people to get what they want. If I was wiser, I shouldnt have trust.
But oh well, its a decision I’ve made. I have to make the best out of it don’t I? I love them, I really do. But its just not something my heart wants to do. But now that I’ve made a commitment, I have to stick to it. I have to follow.
I hope there are other chances in the future. Please, god. You have denied me many pleasures of life. At least let me make a film I really want to do.
I’m hating it so much. I’m hating every moment of my life right now. I’m not hating life. I love life. I just hate the situation I’m in right now.
I’m living a regret.
I’ll learn not to love anymore.
P.S. I thought you were a really good friend, turns out you are not.
P.S.S. I’ll learn not to love anymore.